Taking Responsibility of the Delicate Heart
by LESLIE ANNE FRANKLIN
The Heart – this mysterious wonder that is within each of us and which contains the spirit of love – that which we are. The heart can be regarded as the source of pleasure or pain; the bottomless well of compassion; that which can break apart in pain or break open in grace; innocent and pure; hardened and mean; loving and kind; awake and present.
The heart is the first organ to form during development of the body. It is derived from two primitive heart tubes. Between days 18 to 30, the primitive heart tubes fuse together, bend and twist to form a simple version of the heart. About half way through this process, the heart starts to beat (Penn Medicine 2013). It is no wonder that the heart is our connection to Source and Truth because our very being was created first with this beautiful energy.
As the world spins faster and gets caught up in technological advancement and instant gratification, little time is spent feeling into our hearts and feeling the truth. If we don’t spend time to honor this majestic energy within us we will lose contact with our very being, and get caught in mental (literally mental!) energy. Even though our heart is an organ, we all feel loving well from this area. Some call it a heart chakra. We place our hands in front of our heart in prayer or Namaste or clutch it in fear or apprehension. We can feel when we are openhearted and clear or close-hearted and bitter.
I firmly believe that the world runs on a distorted truth about the heart and love. We learn through media, films and love songs that our happiness lies in finding ‘the other’ and the fact remains that the majority of us spend much more time trying to find this ‘other’ than spending quiet time understanding our own heart. Of course it is a basic need to have affection and communion with another. We want to make love with the beloved, we crave to be held and loved, it’s natural and normal but so many people place so much emphasis on having to have this ‘other’ be the source of their happiness, the source of their love. It is no wonder that so many men want to run after making love with a woman. It is no wonder that many women open themselves and get hurt by their own expectations. Can we simply be with another with no expectations and let the heart commune in its own divinity? We have to put possession, chains, demands, jealousy all because of a distorted truth? The truth is that we all have a heart. The truth is that two people can love each other without expectation. The truth is that for most people, especially for many women, the concept of opening to another with no expectation could be the scariest ride of one’s lifetime and the most exciting one. We have been trained to find ‘the one’, to possess, hold, coddle, protect. This is the role of a mother and father. To love another as an adult with no expectation means the breakdown of society, the very society that is now experiencing more divorces than ever in history.
To love another with no expectations might be the first step towards finding firstly one’s own self respect; secondly one’s respect of another; the first step towards true love, union and unison.
Now the challenge: spending more time with your own heart than you do fantasizing about this other or investing time with the other. Relax and take time to move out of your head and into your heart. Finding the source of wisdom that is yours because at the end of the day, all you have is yourself and your relation to yourself. This is not a lonely concept but a part of feeling integrated with nature and all sentient beings. When you connect more with your own heart you will lessen the need for ‘the other’ – this ‘program’ that the world has suffered enough with. It is time to change the program because the one we have been conditioned by isn’t working. The heart rules over the head every time. Our heart is our beloved anchor and rudder to ourselves. It is the truth of our being. The heart is who we are. It is not outside of ourselves and the more we can connect with our own heart we will find the beloved in everyone and everything.